Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
My roommate didn't flush after her miscarriage. Time to drink myself blind. I need you for moral support. Or so I don't have to drunkenly cry alone anymore. Whatever, help.
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
So. Much. Porn.
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