She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
i just woke up to that girl in my doorway. I kid you not. Tan and lime green thong on. peeing on the carpet in the hallway. Then she collapsed. There is a load of towels in the wash. Just thought you should know when you wake up. Gross.
I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
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