All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
i flashed his best friends last night
you always were good at making good first impressions
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
it's gotten to the point where I just look in my closet, think, "which article of clothing behaves most like a towel?" and then just go with that
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
passed out on bart again and decide to bike home. biked thru a goat farm of angry goats, biked on the freeway, got stopped by the cops, and sat shotgun in the squad car while the officer driving got a video on his iphone of his partner riding my bike on the freeway.
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
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