i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
I feel like im in a tornado of daylight savings, tequila and death
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
Standards are awful. It's like living in the zombie apocalypse. You can only have sex with certain people
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
Randomize
