im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
ok so I'm texting you now like I promised instead of drunktexting aaron and telling him how badly I want his cock tonight. aren't you proud?
this is Aaron, hi
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
When did we convert life to cartoon?
Any idea why the fuck i would replace all the music on my ipod with the fucking Goosebumps theme song?!?
Apparently drunk you is really nostalgic?
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
You are the best. Or certainly adequate for tempering my unholy desires.
That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me.
Randomize
