I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went?
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
Sometimes I get in situations where I realize they think I'm smarter than I am and then it's just one more thing I have to fake.
I'm about to be a big disappointment.
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
Randomize
