Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
I'm at McDonalds and when I walked up to the register the guy said "I'm so sorry." Before I said a word. That's how bad my hangover is.
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
im just glad that if you were going to have awkward hospital sex, you would want it with me
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
Whats spookier? Halloween or waking up to a drunk text from your ex telling you how awesome you are at 2am
Randomize
