So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
Guess who got arrested for public drunkiness, and called jimmy johns for the entire station last night instead of someone to bail me out? The cop that arrested me drove me home. Win.
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
Well I just put wine in my tea
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
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