i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
If there's one thing I think I could really excel it, it's curating a midlife crisis
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