I woke up this morning to the buzzer on my oven going off... I cooked fish sticks at 425 degrees for 5 hours last night. my house smells awesome
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
How did she break his doorknob?
That was our fault. We put a chair under the doorknob so that she wouldn't wander out of his room in the middle of the night and jump into bed with her ex. But she's stronger than we thought.
She said she wants to move in with me. Time to black out and act as if we never had this conversation.
How are you a firefighter? People actually trust you with their lives??
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
Woke up snuggling with a large wooden rhino that I stole last night...obviously, we had fun.
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
Randomize
