i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
He wore the same cologne as my orthodontist so all I could think about was how I hadn't worn my retainer in months
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
The convent might be a nice break from real life
Randomize
