'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
Hangover cure: shower, throw up again, sleep for 4 hours, eat salsa, brush teeth. Good to go.
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
If I pissed all over some chicks bed I would probably apologize for getting so wasted, not putting out, and turning into a god damn R. Kelly Cinderella... Not ask for coffee and a ride home.
How's my date look?
Like a retarded elf
In a good way
....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle.
If, when you wake up, you're wondering why you're in the bathtub, it's because when I tried to move you, you yelled that that was cheating and tried to kick me in the face.
Fair enough.
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
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