Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
I just saw a guy give a mop to his fat wife and say "Look, an exercise stick!"
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
Randomize