How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
my mom just served us mashed potatoes with an ice cream scoop. When I asked her why, she said she thought it would make dinner 'more fancy'...
The Mets? Come back? That'd be like Nickelback writing a good song.
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
It was like god placed me in his bed and said," here's your shot girl. Don't mess this up." And I looked at god and laughed in his face.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
You weren't singing into a microphone in front of an audience. You were screaming into your fist in the check-out aisle in Walmart.
Randomize
