With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
The nice lady at the neighborhood liquor store informs me that we have a new woman-run neighborhood sex shop. Jesus loves me and wants me to have a happy Valentine's day.
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
So here I am, sexting at work.
Randomize
