Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
Randomize
