You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
If Jimminey Cricket were here with me he would be so disappointed.
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
So my parents just watched me pour their rum into a bottle and only add crystal light powder, no water... Talk about being judged. All I could say was "Cortland tricks?"
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
Randomize