ya dads aren't the best wingmen
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
He was so traumatized by the It's a small world ride but he immediately pulled out a flask from god-knows-where and got drunk before the ride was over. The ride operator didn't blame him.
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
Randomize