College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
I don't know what I could have possibly done in a past life to deserve watching my boyfriend projectile vomit margaritas and probs blood while completely naked.
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
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