I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
What do ugly girls do when they get too drunk at parties. They can't pull the whole "sorry i passed out on your couch but i'm hot so it doesn't matter "card
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
Just high enough for therapy.
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
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