Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
Randomize
