how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
DONT YOU DARE YELL AT ME. YOU'RE THE ONE WHO TRIED TO PAY FOR THE CAB WITH YOUR PANERA REWARDS CARD.
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
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