Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
Only you would have to block the fucking governor of Tennessee from reading your tweets
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
I farted in his bed and then in my drunken stupor grabbed hair defanging spray to cover up the stench.
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
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