My favorite part was when he stopped, looked up in the middle of performing oral sex and asked, "you did know it was Arbor Day, right?"
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
Nxt time we drink that much, we'll have to hide the crayons. Crayola-ing a mural on the living room wall wasnt the brightest idea, but it sure is classy. Right?
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