You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
Couldn't find any balloons, so we're doing whippets out of condoms. Being a ho has its benefits.
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
Home-made laxative recipe: activia yogurt and tequila shots. Any ratio ought to work.
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
Randomize
