so this guy on craigslist is offering a case of beer to shave his back. i think i'm gonna take him up on it.
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
i think i just naturally attract stoners
Randomize
