Sign #1 this conference will suck: Ice breaker question, how many proud virgins do we have in the room, overwhelming response. Looks like I'm not getting laid this weekend.
You told the cops that they couldn't arrest you because they weren't hot enough to fuck
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
I'd just like to say before I start drinking tonight that not only do I not find you attractive; I don't want to hook up with you, suck your dick, be your "suga mama" or have your babies. Please disregard any texts, phone calls or voicemails that say otherwise..
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
You threw a handful of caps into a pitcher of Heineken and asked everyone if they wanted to go "bobbing for molly"
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
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