Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
Randomize