IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
Best news of the day: the hot chick at the funeral was NOT related to me... Thank god
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
Doing bumps while the kids play upstairs. #bestnannyever
Why did I wake up in bed with the ironing board and a Mariah Carey mask? Vodka hates me
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
Randomize
