you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
I'm posted up in the bathroom at au bon pain, high as balls, experimenting with eyeshadow combinations and listening to 90s jlo. The girl in the stall next to me just plopped a big one and I laughed, hope I ruined her day
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
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