He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
I just found out I have a small penis.
Couldn't you tell by how you've NEVER had a girlfriend?
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
and i looked up. we had an audience...
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
sick fucks of a feather flock together
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
Randomize