Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
it wasn't lemon gatorade
loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
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