well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
Going to put that on my resume. "Only accidentally snapchatted my titties to all of my friends once."
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
Randomize
