It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
The last bar we left there was a sausage stand right outside and I apparently felt bad those guys were working that late, so I bought a $9 sausage, gave it to some drunk kid and said "I support local businesses!!" I'd say I've done my civic duty.
She just texted me that she's horny, then started quoted random music, then telling me everything she regrets. I don't think there's enough tequila in the world for me to deal with her...
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
Randomize
