She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
Your brother just informed me that half a mouthful is a unit of measurement. I love talking to members of your family.
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
Randomize
