So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
Fighting the police is like screwing a fat girl, if I'm drunk enough I'll do it
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
I don't remember much of last night. But I woke up with very apologetic texts from him this morning so apparently I didn't get laid. Which is stupid.
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
Do you know why I slept in the yard last night?
You said you watched the lion king stoned and had to do it for simba.
Pride rock will get you every time.
Randomize
