i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
I may or may not have been feeling patriotic and banged Captain America in a closet. SPOILER ALERT: We broke his shield
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