yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
He unbuckled his belt, tipped his hat at me, then told me to "saddle up"
this is like your 5th cowboy right? where do you keep finding these guys?!!
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
Randomize