You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
Randomize
