Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
but why does your life always sound like the plot of a porn?
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
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