Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
You tried to impress her by kicking the 5th floor button in the elevator, but you ended up kicking everything from 3 to 11. Then you said, "pretty accurate, huh ladies?"
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
I have aggressive nipples.
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
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