and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
Making drunken Mac n cheese at 3 am I understand why witches constantly stir their cauldrons. Much more homogenized temperature and slim chance of boiling over. Good job witches.
Had to walk of shame past Westminster Abbey this morning. Pretty sure a Japanese tourist took a photo of me.
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
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