I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
Rolled in at 3:30am from the strip club, with all the screaming I did, Siri doesn't even recognize my voice this morning,
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
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