You are an awful beat friend I am goin to die in a car accident and then my corpse is going to be used by criminals ala weekend at bernies to rob a bank then my corpse will go to jail Thanks john Thanks for nuthin
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
Is it weird that the girl he dated after me had a child with him and it has my name? I think it means he's not over me. Or I'm really self absorbed...
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
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