Half Baked? Au contraire, Ben and Jerry, I was fully baked when I ate that whole pint of ice cream.
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
Randomize
