Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
alright so where did all these fingerpaintings on my bedroom wall come from?
dude. you drew those with your dick
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
Randomize
