ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
omg he fucking fingered me this morning. and i was just like this is the most awkward alarm clock ive ever had
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
Randomize
