I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
You know how most people would take your keys when they don't want you to leave a party? Those 2 girls aren't most people. They took my pants instead.
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
I hopped in a random dudes car outside the strip club at 3pm on a Sunday and said "Follow that car!"
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
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