I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
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