I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
Why is there puke in my guitar?
Because you puked in your guitar.
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
he said "I would have fucked you in the chipotle bathroom" and I can't get over how awesome that would've been
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
Randomize
